From the books ... Alcoholics Anonymous (Big Book) and Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions (12 & 12)
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... wife.
BB p.2,
Bill's Story
2.
... wife.
BB p.8,
Bill's Story
3.
... wife.
BB p.41,
More About Alcoholism
I have a shadowy recollection of being in
an airplane bound for New York, and of finding a friendly taxicab driver at the landing field instead of my wife.
4.
... wife.
BB p.67,
How It Works
Notice that the word "fear" is bracketed alongside the difficulties with Mr. Brown, Mrs. Jones, the employer, and the
wife.
5.
... wife.
BB p.79,
Into Action
6.
... wife.
BB p.90,
Working With Others
If there is any indication that he wants
to stop, have a good talk with the person most interested in him -- usually his wife.
7.
... wife.
BB p.177,
Doctor Bob's Nightmare
8.
... wife a
promise that we would not ...
BB p.179,
Doctor Bob's Nightmare
Wishing to be polite, though I felt very badly, I said, "Let's make the call," and extracted from my wife a promise that we would not stay
over fifteen minutes.
9.
... wife admitting
his faults and asking forgiveness.
BB p.79,
Into Action
10.
... wife and
family.
BB p.35,
More About Alcoholism
11.
... wife and
father-in-law became ill.
BB p.5,
Bill's Story
The house was taken over by the mortgage holder, my mother-in-law died, my wife and father-in-law became ill.
12.
... wife and
I abandoned ourselves with enthusiasm ...
BB p.15,
Bill's Story
My wife and I abandoned
ourselves with enthusiasm to the idea of
helping other alcoholics to a solution of their problems.
13.
... wife and
I decided to go anyway.
BB p.2,
Bill's Story
I failed to persuade my
broker friends to send me out looking over factories and managements, but my wife
and I decided to go anyway.
14.
... wife and
I saved $1,000.
BB p.2,
Bill's Story
15.
... wife and
I sought escape.
BB p.6,
Bill's Story
16.
... wife and
I went to see Wallace ...
BB p.177,
Doctor Bob's Nightmare
This worked nicely until my wife and I went to see Wallace Beery in "Tugboat Annie," after which the pant-leg and stocking racket were out!
17.
... wife and
partner he came to the ...
BB p.80,
Into Action
After consulting with
his wife and partner he came to the conclusion that
it was better to take those risks than to stand before his Creator guilty of such ruinous slander.
18.
... wife as
for the husband.
BB p.81,
Into Action
19.
... wife became
deeply interested, and it was ...
BB p.178,
Doctor Bob's Nightmare
My wife became deeply interested, and it
was her interest that sustained mine, though I at no time sensed that it might be an
answer to my liquor problem.
20.
... wife began
to work in a department ...
BB p.4,
Bill's Story
21.
... wife, best
friend, or spiritual adviser.
BB p.63,
How It Works
We found it very desirable to take this spiritual step with an understanding person,
such as our wife, best friend, or spiritual adviser.
22.
... wife came,
scarcely daring to be hopeful, ...
BB p.158,
A Vision For You
His wife came, scarcely daring to be hopeful, though she thought she saw something different
about her husband already.
23.
... wife commenced
to admonish him about it.
BB p.135,
The Family Afterward
24.
... wife dared
not invite people in for ...
BB p.177,
Doctor Bob's Nightmare
We could not be invited out
because I would surely get tight, and my wife dared not invite people in for the same reason.
25.
... wife does
not know, should we tell ...
BB p.81,
Into Action
26.
... wife gets
a divorce and he is ...
BB p.38,
More About Alcoholism
27.
... wife gets
worn out, resentful and uncommunicative.
BB p.81,
Into Action
28.
... wife happily
observed that this time I ...
BB p.5,
Bill's Story
Before then, I had written lots of sweet promises, but my wife happily observed that this time I meant business.
29.
... wife has
endured, and now fully understanding ...
12&12 p.119,
Step Twelve
The alcoholic, realizing what his wife has
endured, and now fully understanding how
much he himself did to damage her and his children, nearly always takes up his marriage responsibilities with a willingness to repair
what he can and to accept what he can't.
30.
... wife has
visited this house to find ...
BB p.160,
A Vision For You
Many a distracted wife has visited this house to find loving and understanding companionship among women who knew her problem, to hear from the lips of their husbands what
had happened to them, to be advised how her own wayward mate might be hospitalized and approached when next he stumbled.
31.
... wife have
had love affairs.
BB p.124,
The Family Afterward
32.
... wife, he
remarked, "Don't see anything the ...
BB p.82,
Into Action
33.
... wife, helped
at times by extreme drunkenness, ...
BB p.3,
Bill's Story
There had been no real infidelity, for loyalty
to my wife, helped at times by extreme drunkenness, kept me out of those scrapes.
34.
... wife, his
children, his "in-laws", each one ...
BB p.122,
The Family Afterward
The alcoholic, his wife,
his children, his "in-laws", each one is likely to have fixed ideas about the family's attitude towards himself or herself.
35.
... wife, his
partner, and his alcoholism by ...
12&12 p.152,
Tradition Five
He interrupted to scoff at this and asserted
he'd fix his wife, his partner, and his alcoholism by himself.
36.
... wife's hope.
BB p.5,
Bill's Story
Nevertheless, I still
thought I could control
the situation, and there were periods of sobriety which
renewed my wife's hope.
37.
... wife ill,
children distracted, bills in arrears ...
BB p.155,
A Vision For You
It was the usual situation: home in jeopardy, wife ill, children distracted, bills in arrears and standing damaged.
38.
... wife inspected
it frequently.
BB p.176,
Doctor Bob's Nightmare
39.
... wife is
forced to become the mother ...
12&12 p.118,
Step Twelve
Very gradually, and usually without any realization of the fact, the wife is forced to become the mother of an erring boy.
40.
... wife is
one of those persons who ...
BB p.135,
The Family Afterward
His wife is one of those persons who really feels there is something rather sinful about these commodities, so she nagged, and her intolerance finally threw him into a fit of anger.
41.
... wife kept
her faith and courage during ...
BB p.178,
Doctor Bob's Nightmare
42.
... wife may
become discontented, even highly resentful ...
12&12 p.118,
Step Twelve
After the husband joins A.A., the wife may become discontented, even highly resentful that Alcoholics Anonymous
has done the very thing that all her years of devotion had failed to do.
43.
... wife may
sometimes say she is neglected.
BB p.97,
Working With Others
44.
... wife may
take with the husband who ...
BB p.122,
The Family Afterward
45.
... wife --
misunderstands and nags; likes Brown; wants ...
BB p.65,
How It Works
My wife -- misunderstands and nags; likes Brown; wants the house put in her name -- pride; personal sex relations; security (fear).
46.
... wife must
become the head of the ...
12&12 p.118,
Step Twelve
47.
... wife, my
friends, and my children that ...
BB p.177,
Doctor Bob's Nightmare
I used to promise my wife, my friends, and my children that I would drink
no more -- promises which seldom kept me sober even through the day, though I was very sincere when I made them.
48.
... wife next
calls saying he is sick, ...
BB p.146,
To Employers
49.
... wife nor
anyone else stands in judgment.
BB p.135,
The Family Afterward
Though he is now a most effective member of Alcoholics Anonymous,
he still smokes and drinks coffee, but neither his wife nor anyone else stands in judgment.
50.
... wife of
an alcoholic.
BB p.119,
To Wives
It is probably true that
you and your husband have been living too much alone, for drinking many times isolates the wife of an alcoholic.
51.
... wife of
another serious drinker.
BB p.112,
To Wives
52.
... wife of
my mistress -- sex relations; self ...
BB p.65,
How It Works
53.
... wife one
Saturday afternoon saying she wanted ...
BB p.179,
Doctor Bob's Nightmare
About this time a lady called up my wife one Saturday afternoon saying she wanted me to come over that evening to meet a friend of hers who might help me.
54.
... wife or
child neurotic.
BB p.122,
The Family Afterward
A doctor said to us, "Years of living with an alcoholic is almost sure to make any wife or child neurotic.
55.
... wife, or
his friends.
BB p.95,
Working With Others
56.
... wife or
husband.
12&12 p.86,
Step Nine
We cannot, for example, unload a detailed account of extramarital adventuring upon the shoulders of our unsuspecting wife or husband.
57.
... wife or
no wife -- we simply do ...
BB p.98,
Working With Others
Some of us have taken very hard knocks to learn this truth: Job or no job
-- wife or no wife -- we simply do not stop drinking so long as we place dependence upon other people ahead of dependence on God.
58.
... wife or
parents whom for years he ...
BB p.82,
Into Action
But he is yet a long way from making good to the wife or parents whom for years he has
so shockingly treated.
59.
... wife's parents.
BB p.4,
Bill's Story
60.
... wife placed
their large home at the ...
BB p.160,
A Vision For You
61.
... wife settled
your difficulties is worth any ...
BB p.100,
Working With Others
62.
... wife --
sex relations; self esteem (fear).
BB p.65,
How It Works
63.
... wife should
fully understand his new way ...
BB p.99,
Working With Others
64.
... wife's slender
purse when the morning terror ...
BB p.6,
Bill's Story
65.
... wife to
applaud while I started out ...
BB p.3,
Bill's Story
66.
... wife usually
goes on doing the best ...
12&12 p.118,
Step Twelve
The wife usually goes on doing the best she knows how, but meanwhile the alcoholic
alternately loves and
hates her maternal care.
67.
... wife was
at work.
BB p.8,
Bill's Story
My wife was at work.
68.
... wife was
informed that it would all ...
BB p.7,
Bill's Story
My weary and despairing
wife was informed that it
would all end with heart failure during delirium tremens, or I
would develop a wet brain, perhaps within a year.
69.
... wife was
planning to go out in ...
BB p.176,
Doctor Bob's Nightmare
If my wife was planning to
go out in the afternoon, I would get a large supply of liquor and smuggle it home and hide it in the coal bin, the clothes chute, over door jambs, over beams in the cellar, and in cracks in the cellar tile.
70.
... wife --
we simply do not stop drinking ...
BB p.98,
Working With Others
Some of us have taken very hard knocks to learn this truth: Job or no job
-- wife or no wife -- we simply do not stop drinking so long as we place dependence upon other people ahead of dependence on God.
71.
... wife who
adopts a sane spiritual program, ...
BB p.130,
The Family Afterward
Nothing will help the man who is off on a spiritual tangent so much as the wife who adopts a sane spiritual program, making a better practical use of it.
72.
... wife, who
sent my newly made friend ...
BB p.179,
Doctor Bob's Nightmare
73.
... wife who
trembles in fear of the ...
BB p.104,
To Wives
But for every man who drinks others are involved -- the wife who trembles in fear of the next debauch; the mother and father who see their son wasting away.
74.
... wife will
never come back for one ...
BB p.99,
Working With Others
75.
... wife would
leave elated by the thought ...
BB p.161,
A Vision For You
He and his wife would leave
elated by the thought of
what they could now do for some stricken acquaintance
and his family.
76.
... wife would
leave him alone, he'd soon ...
12&12 p.152,
Tradition Five
He shouts that if his partner would treat him better, and his wife would leave him alone, he'd soon solve his alcohol problem.
Passages from the Big Book Alcoholics Anonymous
and the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
are reprinted with permission of A.A. World Services, Inc.
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